The Cubs donated shortstop Starlin Castro to 1-877-Kars-4-Kids, the 501(c) (3) charity, pending league approval. Castro has regressed severely after having a batting average of .300 in 2010, his rookie year, and being selected to two all-star teams.

“Right now, it’s nearly impossible for us to get like-value in a trade,” Cubs GM Jed Hoyer said. “It was Coach Dave McKay who came up with the idea. We were brain-storming the other day when Dave mentioned he recently donated a clunker car to a charity.”

“That’s when I picked up the cell and dialed 1-877-Kars-4-Kids.”

Hoyer said a similar idea was floated when the Cubs attempted to unload Alfonso Soriano, but the charitable organization the team approached balked at the offer. “We couldn’t get them to pick up at least half of the $24.5 million left on Sorey’s contract.”

Sources said the team is in talks with United Way about Kevin Gregg with Edwin Jackson going to 1-800-GOT-JUNK.