It seems the only people that didn’t enjoy the concerts at Wrigley Field this past weekend were the rooftop owners across the street.

“First the Cubs want to have this monstrosity of a Jumbrotron in left, then the Pearl Jam and Jason Aldean concerts block our view of the beloved field,” said Jeremy Bennett, a rooftop owner on Addison. “Let me tell you something: Jeremy spoke alright … to Alderman Tom Tunney.”

Tunney has already proposed a solution to this problem.

“Each member of the band may stand on milk crates,” the Alderman said. “That’s my final decision. It’s time for the Cubs to face the music and realize with Daley out of office, I run this town now.”

Mariotti Jr.