Former number one bust JaMarcus Russell was scheduled for a tryout with the Bears at Halas Hall this week but a funny thing happened on his way there: He got lost. Or so he says.

“Man, I was so looking forward to playing for the Bears,” said Russell.” I’ve lost 50 pounds and I feel great, but gosh darn it I took a wrong turn somewhere and didn’t make it.”

However, security cameras at a local Old Country Buffet show six members of the staff carrying out of the restaurant a kicking-and-screaming Russell who was yelling “I’m still hungry you jackasses”

Said one member of the staff :”We open at 11 but around 10:30 I see this very large man banging on the windows saying to let him in. We let him in at 11 and he won’t stop eating. He’s eating right out of the buffet! We decided he had enough after his 15th trip so we had to forcefully kick him out. Then he got into his car and fell asleep. We called police and he finally left.”

Russell,though, thinks it’s no big deal.

“I’ll come work out for them when Tim Tebow comes in,” said Russell. “Even my talents look good compared to Tim Tebow.”

Russell then went back into his car and to sleep off what he called “a major food coma.”

Mariotti Jr.