The Chicago Matadors is a popular “super-sized” dance team that regularly performs to adoring and raucous fans during Bulls games. Hoping to take their routine to the next level for the playoffs, the team sought to add real-life matadors from Spain to the mix. When flights and arrangements became costly, the Bulls PR found a cheaper group of actual matadors in Lake Forest: the Chicago Bears offensive line.

“Who knew we had authentic matadors living in our own backyard?” said Bulls PR coordinator Shaun Hickombottom. “Bulls fans deserve the best. We were looking for matadors that regularly dodge out of the way and allow enemies to run right by them. The Bears’ offensive line makes it look easy. They are truly first-class matadors.”

Tackle J’Marcus Webb was unanimously voted as “Matador Captain,” a distinction that embodies the very best of the matador way: grace, humility, and the ability to let everyone sprint right past you.

“I am planning on doing this for a long time,” said Webb. “Can you believe I get paid for playing no-contact football, and now I get to dance at halftime of Bulls’ games too? I sure am lucky the Bears didn’t draft any new and awesome lineman; I want to be Captain Matador forever!”

Image by Joel N.