Jon Niese through he was returning a favor when he offered to pay for Carlos Beltran’s mole removal, but as it turned out, he was stuck with a bill for a nose job the former Met promised to pay for.
Last season Niese complained to Beltran that he had problems breathing out of his nose. Ever the great teammate, Carlos offered to lay out the cash for Niese to get nasal reconstruction.
“I was just looking out for the kid,” Beltran said. “But then he had to go and ruin it by bringing my mole into the equation. That’s when I pulled the offer, and honestly? It’s why I left the Mets.”
Niese didn’t realize Carlos’s mole was a hot button issue. He thought he was just being courteous.
“People have been calling me ‘Gonzo’ my entire life, so I really appreciated what Tranny did,” the regretful lefty admitted. “I heard people calling him ‘Milk Dud,’ ‘Chef Boyardee meatball ear,’ and saying things like ‘Holy Moley,’ last season … I just kinda thought he’d want to have that thing singed off.”
Niese went on to say the money wasn’t a problem, and he still went through with the surgery, but he’d still like to make it up to his former pal.
“I sent him a gift basket with some New York food, and some decorative bandages to cover the mole up,” Niese added. “I just hope he doesn’t hold a grudge … and if he does? I’ve been working on my curveball; I’ll just ‘2006 Wainwright’ him the next time we play St. Louis.”