The Bears moved quickly to replace GM Jerry Angelo today, hiring Jimmy McCaskey, the 13-year-old great-grandson of team owner Virginia McCaskey.

“I do what I can to be a terrific grandmother and great-grandmother,” said the 88-year-old Virginia. “It broke my heart to watch Jimmy burst into tears during our Christmas Day blowout in Green Bay. He said his one Christmas wish was to have a chance to run the Bears someday and I wanted that day to come when I was still alive to see it.”

While many believe the hiring of Jimmy is just another in a long line of questionable moves by the Bears often marked by nepotism, Jimmy claims he’s up to the task.

“‘I’ve taken first or second in my last three fantasy leagues,” said Jimmy. “I’m known for my great draft picks, unlike the dork-faced loser I’m replacing.”