Giants fans throughout the country have been in complete shock this off-season as GM Brian Sabean has so far restrained himself from signing a washed-up guy in his 30s or 40s. Recent high-priced busts Ray Durham, Omar Vizquel, Edgar Renteria, Miguel Tejada, Aaron Rowand, Dave Roberts, Marquis Grissom, Mike Matheney, Edgardo Alfonso, Bengie Molina, Pat Burrell, Cody Ross, and Mark Derosa seem to finally have taught the longest tenured GM in baseball a lesson.

“It was all fine and dandy when Greg Anderson was on payroll,” said Sabean. “Those veteran signings just don’t work out as well as they used to back when things were loosey-goosey. I guess I actually have to start paying attention to those other teams we have with the young guys.”

The “other teams” Sabean is referring to are the Giants minor league system because the team’s brass is quickly bringing him up-to-date on the entire minor league system.

“It’s a steep learning curve for a guy accustomed to signing old guys based on ‘a veteran presence, leadership in the clubhouse, and a solid track record’,” CEO Larry Baer said this afternoon.  “We’re weening Brian off the notion that those qualities are worth $12 million a year.”

“I had to restrain myself as Jimmy Rollins, Carlos Beltran, Rafael Furcal, and Michael Cuddyer went to other teams for expensive, multi-year contracts,” said Sabean, looking off in the distance, shaking his head. “They could have been Giants, but you know what? You win some, you lose some.”