In the midst of a remarkable hot streak, Broncos QB Tim Tebow has decided to put his team’s AFC West lead in jeopardy by sitting out next week’s game against the Bears so he can play Baby Jesus in his local church’s annual living nativity.
“They asked me to do it back in October,” said Tebow. “I really never thought I’d be playing in December, so I agreed.”
When reporters commented that Tebow may be better suited for Joseph or perhaps one of the shepherds he simply stated, “There was a baby slated to play the role, but he got sick and even though there was a backup who was likely more convincing at the role than me, I had a large, unreasonable fan base at the church who demanded I take the lead.”
Local churchgoer, Thomas Stevenson, who is playing Joseph agreed.
“Yeah, I could be next to a baby that is pretending to be Jesus,” said Stevenson. “Or, I could be next to Tim Tebow—which is like almost being next to Jesus. Maybe even better.”
Tebow’s pastor Dale Johnston agreed.
“Sure, a real baby may actually look more like Jesus, and, well, look more like a baby for that matter, but this is Tim Freakin’ Tebow,” said Johnston. “He will save this church and the Denver Broncos.”
Particularly happy about the choice is 19-year-old Bridget Castor—who is playing Mary.
“I’ve already made his swaddling loin cloth,” Castor said. “I can’t wait to hold him all night long. All night long.”