With the NBA lockout dragging on, players are taking it upon themselves to stay busy by playing ball in Europe, hosting charity pickup games, and marrying and divorcing reality stars. But what about the coaches? Bulls head coach Tom Thibodeau recently found his own way to stay busy during this extended off-season by becoming an evangelical minister.

The newly ordained reverend recently lent some insight on his new profession.

“I had some time to think about what I was going to do during the labor strike,” said Thibodeau. “I thought of what I love to, and that’s teaching and screaming; being an evangelical minister fulfills both of those passions.”

When asked what, if any, of his basketball ways he includes in his sermons, the reverend said he’ll stick to what he knows best.

“I use a small dry erase board when yelling at the parishioners as to where they are in life, and where they need to be,” he said. “I also had the church flash a ‘Make Some Noise’ meter to help build up the dramatic moments of my teachings. Oh, and if I heal 100 people of the devil, the congregation gets a free Big Mac.”

So how long will the coach be an evangelical minister?

“Only until the lockout ends, then I’ll go back to my old job of screaming at people and telling them what they’re doing wrong,” said Thibodeau. “But if this strike goes the whole season I convinced Joakim [Noah] to play Jesus in our Passion Play for Easter this Spring.”

Brian Farrell