In another sign of the growing rift between Bears QB Jay Cutler and offensive coordinator Mike Martz, the latter purchased “a large quantity” of D batteries to hurl at Cutler during Monday’s game against the Eagles.
“This is my chance to get back at him,” said Martz. “My hope is that so many drunk Philly fans will be throwing batteries onto the field, who’s gonna notice the white-haired guy flinging them at Jay?”
Cutler wasn’t surprised when he heard of Martz’s purchase.
“I’m not too worried about it,” he said. “Knowing Mike, he’ll probably take forever deciding exactly how to throw the battery, and then after like a 20-step drop, he’ll realize I’m not even on the field anymore.”
When asked if there was internal strife at Halas Hall, head coach Lovie Smith shrugged.
“Not sure,” he said, chewing on a donut. “I spend most of my time here eating the free food. Krispy Kreme is my donut.”