After painting his garage early Sunday morning, Deerfield native Hank Patterson had planned to spend the rest of the day watching the Cubs-Phillies game on WGN.

“But about halfway through the game, my mind sort of drifted back to the paint in the garage,” said Patterson. “Was it drying evenly? Did the color look different on the wall than it did on the swatch?”

Eventually Patterson decided to go check out the paint. Next thing he knew, two hours had passed and he was still staring at the beige wall, simply watching the paint dry.

“I guess compared to watching the Cubs, even drying paint seems interesting,” he said, pointing to the little spot in the corner that was still a darker brown than the rest. “I already know how the Cubs’ game is going to end, but this paint … well … it could be any number of shades once it’s done drying. Beige. Brown-beige. Eggshell-beige.”

When he finally got around to checking the final score, Patterson was not surprised to learn the Cubs had blown a late lead to lose 4-3 and conclude their road trip with a 2-8 record.

Heckler George