Although the Mets lost $10 million in 2009, $50 million in 2010, and will lose at least $50 million this year, their principal owner Fred Wilpon can’t figure out why his cold calls to people whose names appear on Mets fan Bernie Madoff’s list of investors aren’t yielding positive results. The Mets found the list taped under Madoff’s old seat during the demolition of Shea Stadium after the 2008 season. The location of the discovered list may also help to explain at least one person’s constant use of a cell phone at baseball games.

Wilpon waited to make calls to Madoff’s investors until a $1 billion lawsuit was brought against the Mets, and the team really needed the money. Although Wilpon realizes the lawsuit is brought by the people he is calling, he says he doesn’t know why they won’t invest in the Mets.

“They already went down in a sinking ship,” Wilpon said. In deference to the 5-11 Mets, Wilpon added, “They should be used to it.”

Wilpon said that Madoff had attended a Wilpon family wedding and gave a toaster as a gift.

“It’s a great toaster,” he said. “It shades the toast any way you like from golden brown to black.”

Wilpon added that Madoff was a good dancer and tipped the band, and that he doesn’t know why the investors on the list aren’t more forgiving. “Maybe a free parking pass will lighten their mood,” Wilpon said.

By Rob C. Christiansen

HecklerRob