In an unprecedented move, the Blackhawks announced they’d let season ticket holders whose accounts predate the team’s renaissance each spend several hours with the Stanley Cup, which the team won Wednesday night in Philadelphia.

“You’ve been with us through thick and thin,” owner Rocky Wirtz wrote in an email sent Thursday morning to long-time season ticket holders. “We haven’t made it easy for you to be fans and this is our way of saying ‘thank you.'”

Wirtz went on to reference ways the team’s long-time fan base may have become alienated.

“First my block-head father stopped showing games on TV,” wrote Wirtz. “Then we get good and everyone and their brother starts coming to our games.”

“While we appreciate these bandwagon fans, we understand how they might rub you the wrong way,” wrote Wirtz. “Getting blind drunk, not knowing the rules or player names, standing up in the middle of play, etc. etc.”

“Hell, they kind of annoy me too, and I’m the one cashing their checks.”

Wirtz told the team’s 2,000 or so long-time season ticket holders he would personally bring the Cup to their homes.

“It will give me a great chance to spend quality time with the fans I care about most,” said Wirtz. “Plus, I can collect your deposit on next year’s season tickets if you haven’t already paid. And please don’t forget your prices are going up 25 percent next year.”

hecklerbrad