As the Cubs were flailing away to yet another loss Tuesday night, the Blackhawks had captured the city’s attention on their way to a 5-1 drubbing of the Canucks that solidified a berth to the Western Conference Finals. Ever flexible capitalists, Wrigley rooftop owners will be installing giant flat screens to enable Cubs fans to watch all remaining Blackhawks games rather than Cubs games taking place just several hundred feet in front of them.
“Let’s be honest, no one is paying even bare bottom prices for most Cubs games despite our prime Wrigley views, great food and open bar,” said rooftop owner Phil Sheridan. “Everyone in this town is Blackhawk-crazy, so we might as well give fans what they want.”
Wrigleyville fans approve of the decision.
“It’s long been said that fans will show up to Wrigley for just about anything,” said self-proclaimed “Cubs megafan” Richard Hampton. “They’ll even come out to cheer the Blackhawks on during a playoff run when they could be watching the mediocre baseball going on right in front of them.”
By Brad Zibung, founder and editor in chief