Florida

Recently, the Lightning had egg on their face by presenting a local former sheriff a jersey spelled as, "sherriff." Turns out, they also misspelled their own name. The team is actually the "Tampa Bay Lighting," with their logo being a dim bulb.

Injured Blackhawks goalie Corey Crawford was spotted golfing at Donald Trump’s famed Mar-a-Lago resort in Florida this past weekend. This comes as confusing news to fans who have been in the dark about the Crawford’s mysterious “upper-body injury” for several weeks.

"Mr. Winston is young, high profile, with great long-term earning potential and always seeming to get caught up in some sort of legal drama," said the publication's business editor Bill Freeman. "That's a defense attorney's dream right there."

“We’ve been draining every ounce of energy from this song for several years,” said Bowman. “Honestly, at this point it’s become way too humble. Seriously. We’ve got rings, plural. Girls. Whirlpools. The guys are popping out babies left and right. It’s time to rap about it.”

"Sure, 32 points is a lot for us," said Bradley. "But we looked really good on that blocked-punt safety yesterday. Maybe we can squeak out a few more of those. A couple field goals and an MJD TD here or there and we've got a great chance at 32 points this season."

Aside from a few local personal appearances and sports commentary gigs on national television, Guillen has done little to occupy his time. He told a local radio station that his days are spent mostly watching television. ”I love the Maury Povich Show. I can spend hours trying to figure out who’s the father.”

"I mean, no spoilers obviously, but for those of you who saw the episode ... that last scene, oh my God, right?" a still shaken George told the media after the game. "That was out of nowhere! Just, totally crazy. Needless to say, when we were done with the episode, man, we just weren't in a place to go out and get that win, you know?"