Kansas City

As the Vikings scramble to prepare the University of Minnesota's undersized stadium for Monday night's game against the Bears, many football observers are wondering why the contest won't be held at one of the several other Midwestern NFL stadiums. Turns out each has a reason it can't host the game.

Cubs GM Jim Hendry's annual pre-Christmas week four-day nap ended Sunday morning when his cell phone rang with news that the rival Brewers had acquired Cy Young winner Zach Grienke from the Royals.

Tyler Palko has toiled around the NFL since 2007, but you wouldn’t know it since he had not recorded a stat until last year when he was the Chiefs’ third-string quarterback. After Matt Cassel left last Sunday’s game against the Broncos with an injury to his throwing hand, Palko stepped in behind center and now finds himself starting in his first NFL game against Patriots on Monday Night Football.

“We’re going to suck, but it’s only because we want to suck. That’s how you get the first crack at the top prospects,” said Williams. “The Royals used to have a stranglehold on last place in the division but they’ve decided they want to try and win now, and we wanted to get the high draft picks. It just worked out.”

At least one fan who knows absolutely nothing about sports or history is comparing Sunday's match-up between Kyle Orton and Tim Tebow to the classic boxing matches of the early 1970s between Muhammad Ali and Joe Frazier.

With the Tigers and White Sox both sputtering down the stretch, a noted sports psychologist believes both teams are subconsciously tanking out of sympathy for the third-place and mathematically eliminated Royals, who have not made the postseason since 1985.

During the team's meeting with Reid today, they brought in 10 racks of ribs from Gates BBQ, an entire pig roast from Three Little Pigs BBQ, eight pounds of brisket from the Golden Ox, and a trough full of pulled pork from Arthur Bryant's Barbecue.