Citing a desire to spend some time with family and friends, and perhaps get more than 30 minutes of sleep a night, Chicago Blackhawks captain Jonathan Toews has decided to spend no more than 23 hours per day in the gym or ice rink.

“I’m at a point in my life where I just need to have a little ‘me’ time,” he said. “Obviously, it’s a slippery slope. First I cut back to three hours of skating drills before lunch, and next thing you know I’m going to bed without doing my usual 1,000 squats. But, it would be really nice to eat dinner or maybe even watch half an episode of The Wire. That’s still on the air, right? I haven’t turned on my TV in seven years.”

The Hawks’ captain then proceeded to study game film while doing burpees.

“I’ve been trying to get him to take it easy,” said teammate Patrick Kane. “Just the other day he finally hooked up his Xbox. He didn’t play it or anything, but he totally stopped talking hockey for at least nine minutes. It was pretty sweet. He even let me hang for a beer while he drew up some faceoff plays he planned to share with Coach Q the next morning a few hours before practice.”