Call Giordano’s and tell them to throw a bunch of extra pies in the oven. The NFL Draft is coming to Chicago next year and that means one thing: a chance for the same morbidly obese and angry Jets and Giants fans you see on TV booing every year to come and experience Chicago.

Whereas the tubby guy in the customized “Sanchize” jersey, and his friend who was furious that the Giants wasted their #1 pick on Eli Manning back in the day, may not have time to visit the Natural History Museum or really any museum for that matter, these guys have already done a detailed scouting report on every neighborhood pizzeria, bar and late night hot dog stand in the greater (312) area code. Although the fat guy who denies cheering for the Geno Smith draft pick last year doesn’t know the intricate scouting reports of New York Hot Dogs versus Chicago Style, give him time.

Meanwhile, in a delightful display of fans coming together as one, Chicago and New York fans have promised to boo every single draft pick taken by all three teams, as well as to gang up on and pummel anybody foolish enough to wear a Patriots jersey while attending the draft.