The Blackhawks scored a big victory off the ice when the NHL allowed the team to shorten their games from 60 minutes to 40 so they don’t have to play a third period after dominating the first two.

All of the players were very happy with the decision.

“@#$%in’ right NHL!” goalie Corey Crawford said.

“I must admit after kicking butt for the first two periods, we’re thinking about which bar or strip club we’re going to after the game, then we come out flat for the third,” said Patrick Kane.

Mariotti Jr.