Just moments after it was announced that Joe Girardi had accepted an offer to remain manager of the New York Yankees, your name was put back into the mix of possible candidates to succeed Dale Sveum as manager of the Chicago Cubs.

“With Joe off the market, there’s no real favorite. We’re looking at everyone and anyone. Even you,” said a deflated Theo Epstein. “I mean, damn. Just damn. Does it even matter?”

According to various sources, the Cubs had no real backup plan if Girardi fell through. Despite bringing in a few random coaches and former failed managers, the team is said to be in total scramble mode following the news from New York.

“Can you handle a bullpen?!” GM Jed Hoyer frantically yelled at passersby as he leaned out of his office window at Wrigley Field. “You with the blue jacket! Yeah, you! Any chance you know when to call for a suicide squeeze?”