The Cubs’ search for a manager whose winning percentage is worse than Dale Sveum’s .399 took an unexpected turn when they learned that candidates A.J. Hinch (89 wins-123 losses, .419) and Manny Acta (372 wins-518 losses, .417) had better win-loss ratios than the recently fired skipper.

“A win percentage under .400 fits our sabermetrics,” GM Jed Hoyer said. “We feel like a guy needs to hit rock bottom first, so he has nowhere to go but up.”

The search hasn’t been any easy one so far. ”It’s really tough to find someone whose win record is less than 40 percent, although Robin Ventura will be there soon.”

Candidates who have never managed have a .000 winning percentage, so Mike Maddux, Rick Renteria and Brad Ausmus, technically, would qualify. “They really don’t fit. We won’t feel comfortable unless we know this important hire is totally inept,” said Hoyer.

Known for his great knowledge of baseball history, Hoyer mused, “Ted Williams was 54-100 one year managing the old Senators. Stump Merrill lost 250 games in just 2-1/2 years with the Yankees. Some stiff lost 318 of 484 games with the Blue Jays, and Casey Stengel got beat in 120 games with the Mets in 1962.”

“Unfortunately, you just can’t find that sort of high caliber manager today. It’s just too bad our sabermetics won’t allow us to hire dead guys.”