With the strength-zapping heat of summer arriving, the Cubs have announced they are switching from traditional uniform tops to tank tops.

“For years we have heard how Cub players fade down the stretch because of all the day games at Wrigley, so we’re making the heat less of an issue by having the players wear less clothing,” Cubs President Theo Epstein said. “The tank tops will be made of a very breathable mesh.”

Cubs Chairman Tom Ricketts fully supported the idea.

“I’m almost positive we’ll draw more females to the games because of all the biceps being revealed on the field,” said Ricketts. “We’ll also be raking in merchandise money from all the fans who want to stay current by purchasing the new uniforms.”

Every Cubs player declined to comment about the uniform alteration, although manager Dale Sveum noted, “At least the tank tops are better than the shorts the White Sox wore for a little bit back in the ’70s.”

Photoshop by Joel Nielsen

A. Waite