Record: 2-4 (1-1 vs. Milwaukee, 1-3 vs. San Francisco)

The Cubbies showed some COMMITMENT vs. the World Champion Giants despite losing 3 of 4 games over the weekend. David DeJesus’ bat started to come alive but…did someone say “bullpen issues?” The Blow-pen continued to prove it’s as stable as the North Korean government in blowing 3 saves in the series (and ironically none by the artist formerly known as Carlos Marmol).

Closer du jour Kyuji Fujikawa blew a save Friday and promptly put himself on the disabled list out of shame, and probably to avoid being struck by a rocket off the bat of an opposing batter.

The team took in the Jackie Robinson biopic “42” after the game Friday where Dale Sveum got confused as to why Indiana Jones was in a different movie. Chris Bosio explained it was actor Harrison Ford playing Brooklyn Dodgers president Branch Rickey, but Sveum still seemed a tad confused.

Anthony Rizzo was assessed a two strike penalty by Augusta National for slow at-bats during Monday’s game vs. Milwaukee.

MVP: Starlin Castro – Crushed two homers vs. Giants and raised average to .315, began preparations for attending All-Star game as team’s lonely, single selection to the contest.

LVP: Alfonso Soriano – Cleanup “hitter” ripped a few singles here and there but remains stuck at 0 RBI.

Ask the Magic 8-Ball:
Will super prospect Jorge Soler assault an opposing team’s mascot at some point this season with a bat?
Magic 8-Ball says – All signs point to “yes.”

Patrick O. Elia