New Yankee outfielder Ichiro Suzuki caused quite a stir Thursday when asked which team he’d eventually represent in Cooperstown. Despite carving an impressive 11-year legacy in Seattle, the Japanese born star coyly picked the pinstripes.

“It’s a cult, simply put,” said Jack Zduriencik, Mariners’ Executive Vice President and GM. “He’s been there a few days and they’re already pumping that aura and mystique [expletive] into his brain.”

Ichiro, who came to the Major Leagues at age 27 in 2001 from Japan, won 10 gold gloves, a Rookie of the Year, and a MVP award, while making 10 All-Star teams with the Seattle Mariners. He currently has a handful of hits with the Yankees.

“They have something like 48 Hall of Famers. You know how many we have? None!” continued a “peeved” Zduriencik. “Next you’re gonna tell me Griffey is going in as a Red, like they need any more representation! I’m sick over this.”

Yankee fans have already accepted Ichiro as one of their own, and respect his choice to wear the honorable navy blue Yankee cap into the Hall.

“When you put on pinstripes, you become a Yankee,” boasted Yankee fan, Harvey Lips. “Ain’t no one care bout no Mariners. Seattle? What do they got in Seattle? Coffee? A big needle building? Some guys catching fishes in newspapers? This is New York baby!”

Ichiro was unavailable for comment after his declaration, but some believe his controversial comment was made in jest. His translator was overheard saying that Ichiro loved his time in Seattle, but will “forever be an Orix BlueWave.”

Conz