While NHL officials have not given up hope of finding it, the location of hockey’s storied Stanley Cup is presently unknown, having gone missing while in theĀ possession of Blackhawks backup goalie Cristobal Huet.

For his allotted day with the Cup, Huet had planned to visit his hometown of St. Martin D’Heres, France, but was held up at O’HareĀ  when officials told him he was on the “Do Not Fly” list. While it turns out that Huet’s name was only similar to one on that list, he had trouble convincing TSA employees that he was indeed a Blackhawk. Huet then hopped a cab, intending to hit Chicago hotspots, but the cabbie had trouble understanding his heavy accent and instead drove him to the suburbs.

The goalie almost lost the Cup when drunken revelers attempted to steal it at Durty Nellie’s in Palatine, each of whom Huet attempted to block from the Cup, unsuccessfully.

“Still, Huet couldn’t stop some fat chick from puking in it,” said Mike Bolt, an official NHL Cup keeper.

After failing to convince patrons of a Schaumburg Applebee’s of the Stanley Cup’s authenticity, a drunken, dejected Huet hit the streets screaming, to anyone who would listen, “I was the starting goalie through the regular season!”

He then dropped the trophy, which rolled between his legs and vanished down an open manhole.

From the July 2010 issue by John Biederman. Click here to subscribe today!