While the worst of his legal battles involving a shooting in his homeland seem to be behind him, White Sox shortstop Juan Uribe may have to make more trips to the Dominican Republic as the 2007 season wears on. Always the optimist, Uribe is focusing on the frequent flyer miles he’ll continue to rack up while the legal system takes it course.

“I was looking through my rewards pamphlet, and some of the benefits are pretty sweet,” said Uribe. “I’ll be able to upgrade to first class, get considerable discounts on car rentals, and never have to pay for the headphones for the in-flight movie.”

Last week, a judge ordered Uribe to make what could be his final court appearance next month. During the season, the Dominican courts will continue to keep a close eye on Uribe to prove he’s not trying to flee justice. Thankfully for him, no one will stop Uribe from traveling outside the country.

“By the All-Star break I should be a Premium Gold Member, which guarantees me access to every airport lounge the airline operates,” said Uribe. “I’ve heard these clubs are a great place to meet new employers, which is good for me because [Alex] Cintron is probably going to take my job by June.”

heckler editorial staff