With the Detroit Lions looming, Bears defensive coordinator Ron Rivera decided to give his defense the week off. Rivera doesn’t seem worried about the Lions offense, which scored a total of 6 points in their week one loss to the Seattle Seahawks.

“I’m not worried about Jon Kitna and the Lions offense, believe me.” Rivera said on Tuesday. “Instead of practicing, watching film and wasting numerous hours of our lives, I’d rather let the guys go home, rest and watch daytime TV. I just don’t think the Lions offense is anything to worry about.”

The defense is coming off an impressive outing in week one, where it held Brett Favre scoreless for the first time in his career. Favre and the Packers offense struggled to convert a third down, going just 1-11.

“We just made Brett Favre look bad. Do you really think we’re afraid of Jon Kitna?” asked linebacker Lance Briggs. “I know Mike Martz is their new offensive coordinator but I don’t think he can do anything to help Kitna from throwing the ball three yards short of receivers or help the offensive line block. We’re not going to waste our time planning for the Lions. We’ll just show up on Sunday and win easy.”

Briggs then looked over to defensive end Alex Brown as the offensive players filed past on their way to the practice field.

“Hey, Alex, let’s go catch the 12:30 showing of ‘Talladega Nights.'”

heckler editorial staff