The online world is preparing itself for a slew of uninspired and unoriginal jokes and memes to coincide with the beginning of this year’s Crosstown Classic.
Google Analytics already show that searches for “1908,” “White Sox attendance,” and “hilarious Jake Arrieta steroids article” have increased by 500 percent since Sunday afternoon.
“At least the Cubs can fill their stands!” posted a 20-something-year-old female Cubs fan whose baseball IQ is lower than her average blood alcohol content.
“1908,” a Sox fan simply countered, with those four keys on his keyboard seemingly stuck from his fetish of getting off to the Cubs’ failure.
“With how polarized Chicago is as a sports town, at least until they can gather together to call for the beheading of Jay Cutler, we don’t expect Cubs and Sox fans to get along,” said Al Gore, inventor of the Internet.
“So go ahead and get blacked out tomorrow, yell at little kids and justify getting a felony record for defending your team’s honor. But please, for the love of God, at least be original in your trash talking.”
Examples of nontraditional barbs include, but are not limited to:
– The Sox standing in the AL Central makes for a good instructional video on tornado safety
– I’m glad that Deflategate is finally over. But since we’re on the topic of Sammy Sosa’s testicles…
– Sox fans are more stuck in the past than the average Texas textbook
– Cubs fan: “Who’s your favorite Simpsons character?” Sox Fan: “Bart, man!”