Bulls head coach Tom Thibodeau freaked out his date after sketching in extreme detail what he hoped would happen after their lovely dinner together. Known for his thorough game-planning on the basketball court, Thibodeau hoped this level of meticulousness would extend to his social life. Before the waiter served Thibodeau and his date, Kate, dessert at Joe’s Seafood, the Bulls coach grabbed a napkin from the table and began scribbling out his hopes for the rest of the evening.

“It was a bold maneuver,” said Kate. “Tom was drawing on a napkin for about 45 seconds before I asked, ‘What are you doing?’ He handed the napkin to me, winked, and said, ‘How about you and me run this play?’ I was so flabbergasted I can’t remember all the details, but the napkin definitely had drawings of stick figures, booze and what I believe was some type of noises coming from a bedroom. Who does this guy think he is?”

The Bulls coach shrugged off Kate’s horrified reaction to the napkin, insisting he was merely outlining the exact series of events that would most likely result in him scoring, as any prepared coach would do.

“I wasn’t trying to be crass,” said Thibodeau. “I agree the stick figures were a bit rudimentary, but I was on the clock and had to draw up the play as fast as I could. I thought Kate would appreciate my thoughtfulness and truthfulness. Did you see the napkin? I was over-matched in the date and the only way I would score was with a precise combination of alcohol, music and shoulder massaging. It isn’t rocket science.”

Kate stormed out of the restaurant after reading the napkin, but later she reluctantly admitted the play would have worked had Thibodeau not tipped his hand.