NFL players aren’t the only ones preparing for the postseason. Fans are also getting set to deal with FOX network’s lead play-by-play man, Joe Buck, who has made it clear he plans to “annoy the hell out of” everyone watching the playoffs.

Buck, he of the oddly high forehead and son of Hall of Famer Jack Buck, feels he didn’t get enough time to annoy America when the World Series ended in just five games. He plans to amp up the arrogance level to 11 all the way through the NFC championship game.

“People thought they were sick of me when I tried to name every San Francisco player from 1954 to the present as the Giants celebrated the World Series in Arlington,” said Buck. “Well, they’ve got another thing coming. For the NFL playoffs, I’m going to polish my forehead as bright as a star going supernova, make references so obscure the players referenced won’t even recall them, and I’ve been in London this past week taking classes at the Yorkshire Institute for Haughtiness and Looking Down on People.”

When informed of Buck’s sinister plot, his broadcast partner/Dallas pretty boy Troy Aikman vowed he’d stuff a sock in the prickly pontificator’s mouth if things really got out of hand.

“I’m a jock. He’s a nerd,” said Aikman. “That’s how it works.”

Patrick O. Elia