Great news: The Heckler’s May issue has hit the streets. As usual, it’s packed full of unbelievable Chicago sports news. This month The Heckler also introduces its Fan Pass Membership, which we think is just too good a deal to pass up. Be sure to check it out.
Among this issue’s headlines
Moving walkway installed to speed up Piniella mound visits
Contreras recalls rooming with Ty Cobb
Study reveals shortage of Wrigleyville bars
Bradley pulls left hamstring while being treated for sore right hamstring
Soriano to be randomly placed in batting order; Piniella uses ‘Alfons-o-matic’ device to determine lineup
T-Pain declines invite to sing at Wrigley; Cites Cubs’ refusal to let him bring Auto-Tune
Gathright on pace for 10 ABs, zero hits this season
Fontenot, Theriot merge to create full-sized player
Cubs shorten fences 200 feet to help Derrek Lee’s HR total
Zambrano makes switch to decaf
Cash-strapped Trib, Sun-Times make beat writers share hotel rooms
Fan questions decision to burn Fukudome jersey last season
Wrigley now surrounded by bars named after alcoholic beverages
Cotts named lefty reliever
of the month
Kenny Williams aims for entirely Cuban roster by 2012
Obama uses executive power to add Pujols to Sox
Pittsburgh Pirates taken hostage by Somali pirates
10 pro-Brewer, 10,000 anti-Cub t-shirts worn by Milwaukee fans at Miller Park
Woo-Woo in History: Ronnie pled the 5th in 2005
‘Bulin Wall’ promo goes wrong; No one can enter United Center after 8-foot wall erected around United Center
‘Dee-troit sucks’ chant breaks out again after Hawks win over different team; Confused Canucks not sure what to think
ESPN launches new all-cornhole channel
Cutler completes his transition to Chicago by visiting every bar in town
Madden retires to spend more time with Favre
Ben Gordon already looking forward to multiple max contract offers; Also looking to get unicorn
Del Negro to learn how to coach in offseason
Columnists
Joe Malonecki and South Side Tina have twins on the way
The Heckler’s Sports Talk Radio Man Screamin’ Johnny Blaze thinks the Cubs and Sox should finally unite
Real Deal
Playin’ the Ponies for 5 Hours with Wood at Stretch Run
Jen makes her triumphant return
Becca wants you off the bandwagon
Loco Rob thinks the losing might not finally be over
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