Friday, April 12, 2024

Martin Havlat consults genie, retracts wish to be invisible

“I’ve been camped out right in front of the net all year! Nobody can find me,” said Havlat. “These genies, they don’t tell you things. Sometimes I think they are in the bottle for a reason.”

The Heckler sues the NHL for stealing material after Sharks coach misses games due...

In a rare turn of events, the well-regarded sports web site The Heckler has sued the NHL, the San Jose Sharks, and commissioner Gary Bettman because of a stretch of games last week in which Sharks coach Todd McLellan had to sit out for a concussion.

NHL rulebook update: beating Hawks, Sharks in regulation now worth three points

“Consider the superhuman effort it would take to actually overcome the inevitable six-goal barrage. Add to that the endless forechecking, skilled defense and two hot goalies,” said a breathless league executive. “We wanted to make such an amazing victory special. That is, if it ever actually happens.”