Bears RB Matt Forte has had a tough go thus far in his second season, and struggled mightily Sunday night against Atlanta. Former promising Chicago tailbacks Rashaan Salaam and Curtis Enis have begun offering Forte some words of wisdom.

“Pot, dude. Tons and tons of pot,” said Salaam, a Heisman winner who flamed out after an impressive rookie campaign with the Bears. “Seriously, you can buy tons of weed with all that money you make.”

Enis had a different take.

“Dude needs to get really fat,” said Enis. “All that extra weight will help keep him warm if he ever has to take a third-shift factory job like I did a couple years back.”

From the October 2009 issue by Brad Zibung, editor in chief