Bill Langley’s dominance of his Yahoo! Sports fantasy football league was not enough to save his marriage, the Chicago native recently discovered.
“I was trying to explain to Sheila why this run is so special, when she suddenly threw up her hands and told me she wanted a divorce,” said Langley. “It was almost like the success of The GridIronMikes made her even madder. She mumbled something about me valuing fake football over her…and just walked out.”
Added Langley: “Way to ruin one of the greatest moments of my life.”
The Langleys have been married for nearly eight years, and during that time, Sheila has never once expressed anything but disdain for his fantasy career, Bill claims.
“All she wants to talk about are babies, family, the woman at work who’s out to get her, new appliances and why I haven’t taken the trash out yet,” said Bill. “Maybe if she spent more time enjoying my historic run and overall fantasy genius, I’d be interested in whatever she’s crying about this week.”
This marks the second and, according to her, final time Sheila has walked out on her husband.
“Last time he forgot my birthday because he was busy with his live fantasy draft at Hooters,” she said. “This time he doesn’t get another chance. It’s over. He and his bald head can have the fake football all to themselves from now on. I’m going to find some guy who likes golf.”