Thursday, April 25, 2024

An Open Letter to Lingerie Football League Commissioner Mitch Mortaza

Tuesday afternoon The Heckler published a story about the Lingerie Football League. About two minutes later, their lawyers sent us a cease and desist. Here's what we think of that.

Determined to get more championships than Rodgers, Favre joins Lingerie Football League

Anyone who thought Brett Favre would quietly drift into retirement ... thought wrong. According to sources, Aaron Rodgers' Super Bowl win left Favre furious, and ultimately caused him to put off retirement once again.

Exotic dance industry breathes sigh of relief as NFL lockout comes to an end

“We were all hurting,” said a dancer named Sapphire as she shimmied down a pole. “Not only were we not getting guys in the champagne room, we couldn’t even get tips on the floor. Girls were going hungry. We thought we were going to have to go back to playing in the Lingerie Football League.”

Stupid Hoosiers, Cutler, Snooki and a shirtless Toews: The Heckler’s 10 most popular 2011...

2011 was quite an eventful year in the world of unbelievable sports news, but given The Heckler's list of top 10 posts during the year, it's pretty clear our audience cared mostly about ripping on people from Indiana, Jay Cutler and sex.

WNBA’s topless 2012 draft fails as only lonely creeps are interested

Contrary to popular belief, the WNBA still exists, and league officials are pulling out all the stops to gain interest. This year's 2012 WNBA draft was held earlier this week, in a VFW hall outside of Newark, N.J., and was "top optional" to generate interest in the failing league.

Goodell claims there are just as many concussions in Lingerie League as NFL

"If I had cleavage and side-boob bouncing in my face on a football field, I'd certainly fall down and hurt myself," Goodell said. "The risk of injury due to indecency in the NFL is nil."

Jets trade Tebow to Lingerie League team

A tearful Tebow told reporters at a farewell press conference, “While I’m sorry to leave the Jets, I look forward to being with my new Sin teammates and the challenge of the Lingerie-brand of pro football.”