Thursday, April 25, 2024

Romo has ‘awesome dream’ about only being sacked 24 times in Bears game

"Obviously the number will be closer to 50 or 60," he said. "But a guy can dream, right? I mean maybe their entire line will forget to board the plane, and then their linebackers will only get to me a handful of times a series."

Hilarious Cowboys think ugly win over Browns somehow makes them relevant

Despite barely squeaking past the hapless Cleveland Browns in overtime, Dallas Cowboys coaches and players rejoiced on Sunday, believing their inept offense had turned a corner or something.

NFL promotes Sunday night Cowboys-Eagles game as ‘2012 Irrelevance Bowl’

"Well, I had to throw Philly a bone and give them a game in prime time they could win," he said. "Plus it gives us a new game to market. With any luck, the 2012 Irrelevance Bowl will be at least twice as popular as the 2012 Pro Bowl."

Jerry Jones considers placing Dez Bryant on IR, adding himself to roster

"There is a certain former all-conference free agent out there I've had my eye on for awhile," Jones said as he turned to face the gigantic mirror that lines an entire wall of his suite. "Yes sir. Just the guy for the job."

Ryan brothers hold their own ‘Bro Bowl’ over electric football game in dad’s basement

"I guarantee I'm going to win the Bro Bowl," Rex boasted during the pregame spread of chicken wings, nachos and Budweiser. "With Mark Sanchez as my triple-threat quarterback, there's no way my hack of a brother can take me down!"

The 8 Stages of Preparing For Monday Night Football

From waking up excited to watching the actual game, the path from Monday morning to Monday night is a roller coaster of emotions.

Report: Not enough Botox in world to turn Jerry Jones’ frown upside down

"After much calculation, we've determined there is simply not enough Botox in the world to fix what ails Mr. Jones," said a spokesman for the global health agency. "It's unclear if surgery would even be able to reverse the cumulative effects of owning the Cowboys at this point."