Midwest

"Yeah, it's true," said head coach Matt Nagy. "Jimmy left the field right after that play and we're not sure where he wound up."

A minor controversy erupted Thursday when Cubs 3B Kris Bryant was quoted as saying baseball isn't fun for him anymore. He later clarified his comments, saying they were taken out of context.

"I understand a lot of people think I'm rushing back to play in this game even though I'm not healthy," said Mahomes on a video press conference, "but could an unhealthy person do this?"

A Very Important Podcast by The Heckler is back! Today's guest is Brian Chang, a friend of Brad's who recently wrapped up a seven-game winning streak on Jeopardy! during which he netted $163,904 in prize money. Only about 30 other people have had a streak like that in the history of the show.

Even though the Cubs managed to trade Dempster to the Rangers for two minor leaguers, Theo Epstein is said to be miffed by Dempster's stubbornness at nixing the Braves deal and promises to bring him back to the Cubs next season as retribution.

The Rangers created this debacle by sending Hamilton to the airport to welcome the new Ranger. Following a brief ride back from the airport, Hamilton exited the limousine wearing a Nolan Ryan jersey, spewing line after line about "letting pitchers stay in for 150 pitches" and "giving Robin Ventura a beat down."

"I've not been with the Cubs long, but I'm well aware of how cursed this franchise has been through the years," said team president Theo Epstein. "We're all dreading the very likely possibility that Ryan will blow out his elbow in Pittsburgh this afternoon."