In what is considered the greatest upset in Olympic bid history, Cardinals utility man and former Cub Mark DeRosa helped St. Louis beat out Chicago and several international cities for the right to host the 2016 Summer Olympics, further confirming the Cubs and GM Jim Hendry made a major gaffe by trading DeRosa away this offseason.

DeRosa met with IOC officials Tuesday to outline his proposal.

"My presentation to the IOC began with my striking grin and a variety of interesting facts, like my career .277 batting average and that I'm married to a former model," said DeRosa. "I followed that up with five minutes of fireworks, one baby juggling three larger babies and an oil painting depicting me lighting a cigarette with the Olympic torch. I flashed my charming grin again, and what do you know, the Olympics are coming to the Loo."

From the September 2009 issue by Ben Kobold

Related Articles :

• Body parts from Cubs rotation pieced together to form one healthy pitcher (Thursday, Aug. 20, 2009)
  
• Milton Bradley arrested after interstate killing spree (Friday, Aug. 28, 2009)
  
• Radio Brief: Piniella claimed on waivers by Cardinals minor league team (Tuesday, Sep. 1, 2009)
  
• Sept 09 issue is out: Hendry's job hunt, Big Z's really big gig, Favre's un-retirement and much more (Friday, Sept. 11, 2009)
  
• Hendry mad he missed free resume day at Kinko's (Wednesday, Sept. 23, 2009)
  
• Cubs blame last century's bad luck on 'Curse of Vine Line' (Monday, Sept. 28, 2009)
  
• We Gone! Chicago will not host 2016 Olympics (Friday, Oct 2, 2009)
  
• Daley didn't realize IOC members could vote only once (Friday, Oct. 2, 2009)
  
• Daley blames Cubs for Olympics loss (Friday, Oct. 2, 2009)
  
• IOC officials claim gang of machete-wielding Rio residents had no impact on decision (Friday, Oct. 2, 2009)