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The Heckler - Multimedia Archive

Radio Brief: Chicago sports media working to correct recent underreporting of unfounded rumors
Wednesday, Jul. 28, 2010
The Chicago sports world is very worried about the lack of wild speculation gripping the city.
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Radio Brief: Sox admit they turned around season just to piss off Cubs fans
Thursday, Jul. 22, 2010
Paul Konerko says the team's incredible turnaround was inspired by their enjoyment of messing with Cubs fans.
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Radio Brief: Woman pissed recent run of decent play has made husband care about Cubs again
Monday, July 12, 2010
A woman can't believe her husband has been fooled into thinking the Cubs still have a chance.
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Radio Brief: Zambrano explodes in spectacular Fourth of July display
Monday, Jul. 5, 2010
Some of the Independence Day fireworks seen in the Chicago sky were actually the Cubs pitcher once again blowing up.
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Radio Brief: Cubs fan considers unprecedented switch to the Sox after Zambrano blowup
Monday, Jun. 28, 2010
Zambrano's latest antics cause one North Side fan to contemplate what used to be unthinkable.
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Radio Brief: Hendry makes another bad move, giving himself a 5-year extension
Wednesday, Jun. 23, 2010
The Cubs GM continues his disappointing run by extending his disappointing run.
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Radio Brief: Bandwagon jumpers promise to remain Hawks fans, unless Bulls sign LeBron
Wednesday, Jun. 16, 2010
People throughout the Chicagoland area say they'll stick with their new love, unless LeBron comes to the Bulls and makes basketball interesting again.
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Radio Brief: No longer distracted by Blackhawks, Cubs fan realizes team sucks
Monday, Jun. 14, 2010
With the Stanley Cup playoffs over, a North Side fan pays attention to baseball for the first time only to discover the season is basically over.
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Radio Brief: Typo-laden Chicagosports.com misspells own URL
Wednesday, Jun. 2, 2010
The website known for its spelling mistakes makes a big one.
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Radio Brief: Bulls begin wooing of LeBron by offering jobs to members of his entourage
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
The Bulls are hoping they can make the decision to sign with them easier for the league MVP by putting his lackeys on their payroll.
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Video Report: First-ever UFC promotion at U.S. Cellular Field deemed successful
Monday, May 24, 2010
Fans beat each other up while fans cheer and security stays away
Late last week, the White Sox held their first-ever joint promotion with the Ultimate Fighting Championship and allowed fans to duke it out in the stands while an angry mob of fans cheered, threw beers and even joined in.
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Radio Brief: Cubs, Sox pin playoff hopes on petition to combine their win totals
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
The two Chicago baseball teams realize their only shot at making it to the postseason this year is if they're allowed to pool their wins together.
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Radio Brief: Piniella takes different approach to nonsensical post-game ramblings
Thursday, May 13, 2010
The Cubs manager went about confusing reporters in a brand new way this week.
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Radio Brief: Chicagosports.com visitor scammed by promise of cheap Viagra in blog comment section
Thursday, May 6, 2010
A sports fan is tricked into giving his credit card info.
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Radio Brief: Second major shake-up for Cubs as Piniella moves Rothschild behind the plate
Wednesday, Apr. 28, 2010
The Cubs skipper is doing everything he can to help his struggling bullpen, first making Zambrano a reliever and now turning his pitching coach into a catcher so he'll have unlimited trips to the mound.
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Radio Brief: Now on ESPN, Schilling still doesn't realize everyone thinks he's a jag-off
Tuesday, Apr. 20, 2010
The newest baseball analyst on ESPN is under the false impression that people actually will value his opinions.
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Radio Brief: Chicagoland women wishing they had taken advantage of their husband's attention before losing it to baseball
Thursday, Apr. 15, 2010
Husbands once again checking out emotionally for the next six months.
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Radio Brief: Hawks slumping purposely in attempt to avoid Red Wings in playoffs
Tuesday, Mar. 30, 2010
The Blackhawks are hoping to avoid facing Detroit in the first round of the NHL playoffs, even if it means losing now to do so.
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Radio Brief: Like Bradley, Kevin Gregg claims he was victim of Cubs fan prejudice
Wednesday, Mar. 24, 2010
The Cubs former closer says North Side fans also have hatred of dorky-goggled white men.
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Radio Brief: Disgruntled Bears fan bashes big free agent signings, says Angelo still a moron
Monday, Mar. 8, 2010
A pessimistic Bears fan thinks the team's free agent spending spree was a waste of money.
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Radio Brief: Only Bulls fan who still cares about this season upset over losing streak
Friday, Mar. 5, 2010
Every other fan has moved on, looking forward to free agent signings.
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Radio Brief: Angelo discusses the draft, mistakenly thinking people still value his opinions
Tuesday, Mar. 2, 2010
Steve Rosenbloom sets eye-rolling world record listening to the Bears GM share his "expertise."
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Radio Brief: Piniella's in-game naps to be less comfortable after agreeing to remove mattress from dugout
Tuesday, Feb. 23, 2010
The Cubs coach will be forced to sleep right on the dugout bench.
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Radio Brief: La Russa, McGwire seen together on Valentine's Day date
Wednesday, Feb. 17, 2010
The Cardinals manager was spotted canoodling with his hitting coach at a local restaurant on Sunday.
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Radio Brief: Martz's pass happy offense already getting Cutler sacked
Tuesday, Feb. 9, 2010
Still seven months before the 2010 NFL season begins, but the sacks are already starting.
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Radio Brief: Potential candidates keep bowing out as Lovie's search for a landscaping company continues
Wednesday, Feb. 3, 2010
While he may have finally found a coordinator willing to work for him, the Bears coach is still getting turned down by potential lawn care companies for his home.
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Radio Brief: Forte surgery just one of many for Bears, including Angelo's dumbass-ectomy
Tuesday, Jan. 26, 2010
The Bears admit to a rash of procedures undergone by players, coaches and front office staff.
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Radio Brief: Fuld drunkenly predicts five straight World Series titles at Cubs Convention
Tuesday, Jan. 19, 2010
Perception of the Cubs outfielder as an unpretentious, regular kind of guy not prone to crazy pronouncements makes fans believe his prediction.
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Radio Brief: Bears brass misuse words qualified, results, and many, many others at recent press conference
Tuesday, Jan. 12, 2010
Officials from Webster's are needed to clear up mass confusion.
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Radio Brief: Carlos Silva arrested after food rage incident
Wednesday, Jan. 6, 2010
The new Cubs pitcher goes crazy after getting denied Burger King breakfast because they had stopped serving it for the day.
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Radio Brief: Bulls considering Lovie to replace equally inept Del Negro
Wednesday, Dec. 30, 2009
Looking once again for incompetence in their coaching search, the Bulls might hire Lovie Smith if he becomes available.
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Radio Brief: Lovie to spend Christmas with only sportswriter who thinks he shouldn't be fired
Wednesday, Dec. 23, 2009
The Tribune's Dan Pompei claims his invite to the Smith household for the holidays is unrelated to his constant defense of the Bears head coach.
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Radio Brief: Circus run at UC extended with Bulls playing role of clowns
Wednesday, Dec. 9, 2009
While Ringling Bros. has left the United Center, the circus lives on with the Bulls playing like a bunch of clowns.
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Radio Brief: Cubs spurn Mesa and Naples, announce Spring Training move to Schaumburg
Tuesday, Dec. 8, 2009
The Cubs figure out a way to maximize their profits from moving their Spring Training facilities.
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Radio Brief: Hendry spending offseason office hours sleeping, eating nachos
Wednesday, Dec. 2, 2009
For the first ever, the Cubs GM is reprimanded by the team's owner for loafing through the offseason.
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Radio Brief: Madden unretires to call Thanksgiving game, stuff new animals into turkey
Tuesday, Nov. 24, 2009
The former broadcaster has improved upon his original Turducken by adding new kinds of meat.
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Radio Brief: Lovie confident Bears can go 6-10, still make playoffs
Tuesday, Nov. 17, 2009
The Bears coach continues to believe he has a playoff bound team no matter how bad their season goes.
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Radio Brief: Website with countdown to important Chicago sports events having trouble coming up with them
Tuesday, Nov. 10, 2009
With big moments scarce, Chicagosports.com is forced to use its new countdown feature for more mediocre ones.
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Radio Brief: Reinsdorf doesn't understand how Ricketts can love the team he owns
Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2009
The White Sox owner feels animosity towards team and its fans is the right way to go.
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Radio Brief: Steve Rosenbloom to only use absolutes when writing about the Bears
Monday, Oct. 19, 2009
The sportswriter will see things entirely in black and white when it comes to the Bears this season.
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Wade's last stand?
Thursday, October 08, 2009
The Heckler cartoon by Rick Atkinson
Is this the last stand for the Cowboys coach?
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Screamin' Johnny Blaze suggests some new careers for Milton Bradley where his persecution complex and general craziness might be assets
Friday, Sep. 25, 2009
If another rocky year and his recent suspension means Bradley's run out of second chances in baseball, The Heckler's sports talk guy has a couple ideas of new professions where he can utilize his true skills.
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Radio Brief: With Cubs out of contention, local fan spending more time annoying his wife
Tuesday, Sep. 22, 2009
A Cubs fan has a lot more free time now that he's stopped watching baseball, and his wife has realized she's not too happy about it.
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Radio Brief: WGN cuts rest of baseball season from schedule in favor of more compelling live feed from Cutler Cam
Tuesday, Sep. 15, 2009
Acknowledging fans' disinterest in watching more bad baseball, Chicago's two main MLB broadcasters are changing around their program schedules.
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Radio Brief: Fan gets realistic about Bears season, changes total win prediction from 19 to 18
Tuesday, Sep. 8, 2009
A local Bears fan realizes he may have been a bit too enthusiastic when predicting an undefeated through the playoffs season.
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Radio Brief: After Sox final game there, drunken Hawk tries to demolish Metrodome with sledgehammer
Thursday, Sep. 3, 2009
White Sox announcer follows night of drinking with arrest for saying goodbye to the Twins stadium in his own way.
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Radio Brief: Piniella claimed on waivers by Cardinals minor league team
Tuesday, Sep. 1, 2009
The Cardinals think their rival's manager is definitely good enough to lead their double-A team.
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Screamin' Johnny Blaze gets his voice back just in time to yell about how bad the Cubs and Sox suck
Thursday, Aug. 27, 2009
Screamin' Johnny Blaze voices his displeasure, loudly, for the way this baseball season is going.
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Radio Brief: Sportswriter Steve Rosenbloom runs out of things to complain about in the sports world
Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2009
Blogs on Chicagosports.com will be rants focusing on his own daily life after exhausting sports-related topics.
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Radio Brief: Brenly unjustly criticizes man who plans to give foul ball to a kid, only later
Monday, Aug. 24, 2009
A fan who keeps a foul ball draws the ire of the Cubs broadcaster, who is unaware the man is going to give it to his nephew.
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Radio Brief: Signing with Eagles puts spotlight on what Vick did to actual eagles
Wednesday, Aug. 19, 2009
In the process of working his way down to the torture of bugs, Michael Vick may have made a stop at eagle.
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Radio Brief: Shots of blondes on WGN fan cam decreases due to cameraman's jealous girlfriend
Monday, Aug. 17, 2009
Girlfriend forces cameraman to focus more on brunettes.
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Radio Brief: Chicagosports.com posts 100th straight story with at least three typos in it
Thursday, Aug. 13, 2009
The Tribune's sports website breaks The Heckler's record of 99.
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Radio Brief: Lovie's hiring of his own son is not nepotism, says Lovie
Monday, Aug. 10, 2009
The Bears coach is hiring his family members but still denying nepotism.
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Radio Brief: Vasher makes painful discovery that Cutler throws just a tad bit harder than Orton
Wednesday, Aug. 5, 2009
Bears DBs realize they can no longer spend training camp trying to knock down their quarterback's passes with their face.
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Radio Brief: Brenly to stop making fun of Santo's toupee after deciding it's time to get one for himself
Monday, Aug. 3, 2009
The Cubs TV analyst has asked Ron Santo for hairpiece advice.
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Radio Brief: Cubs organist to play "Benny Hill" theme song during every ball hit to Soriano
Thursday, Jul. 30, 2009
Soriano's madcap misadventures in the outfield have inspired organist Gary Pressy.
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Radio Brief: Knowing they'd never hear the end of it, baseball world is ecstatic Pierzynski did not catch perfect game
Monday, Jul. 27, 2009
Boasting of the Sox catcher would have been unbearable if he had been behind the plate for Buehrle's perfect game.
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Radio Brief: Anticipating a hot streak to rival his current slump, Cubs extend Soriano for 8 more years
Thursday, Jul. 23, 2009
Jim Hendry figures Soriano's streakiness will pay off with a nice, long hot run.
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Radio Brief: Price tag on Halladay forces Sox to pursue cheaper, crappier starter
Tuesday, Jul. 21, 2009
Ken Williams will settle on trying to add Adam Eaton to his pitching staff.
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Radio Brief: All Star Game ratings beaten by just about everything
Wednesday, Jul. 15, 2009
Showcase for baseball's stars is again beaten by America's Funniest Home Videos among others.
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Radio Brief: Cutler decides he doesn't need Ron Turner, will call his own plays
Monday, Jul. 13, 2009
The new Bears quarterback figures there's no way he'll be benched considering who his backups are.
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On Deck Radio Report: To woo Olympic Committee, Daley will turn to trademark tactic of bribery and other predictions
Monday, July 6, 2009
This week's predictions: Chicago's mayor will use an old ploy to win the 2016 games, the Cardinals will come to town and bring their hick fans along, and Mark DeRosa will actually be booed at Wrigley.
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On Deck Radio Report: Hilarious clip of Jay Cutler calling Devin Hester a No. 1 wide receiver will become a YouTube hit and other predictions
Monday, June 29, 2009
This week's predictions: viewers will love video of Bears QB's absurd statement, a mayoral bet will be placed on the Cubs/Brewers series, and the Cubs broadcasters will ask for a little extra.
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On Deck Radio Report: Comerica crowd will be completely pro-Tigers with Cubs fans too afraid to travel to Detroit and other predictions
Monday, Jun. 22, 2009
This week's predictions: the Cubs will not be able to draw their usual large road crowd in Detroit, Tiger Woods will set another PGA record, and Derrick Rose will switch to a sport where his recently announced transgressions are no big deal.
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On Deck Radio Report: At Wrigleyville restaurants during Crosstown Classic, Sox fans will encounter something new - napkins - and other predictions
Monday, Jun. 15, 2009
This week's predictions: Sox fans will be amazed by the new things they find at North Side eateries, the Cubs and Sox respective hotheads will cause a postponement, Jay Cutler will show he's a true leader of men on bar crawls, and Geovany Soto will sustain an injury.
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On Deck Radio Report: Rain delay for Cubs in Houston will be caused by Berkman Twinkie-eating contest and other predictions
Monday, Jun. 8, 2009
This week's predictions: a food contest will prevent an Astros employee from closing the stadium roof, auto shops will hope for big business with Joe Crede in town, and Nathan Vasher will continue to excel but not on the field.
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On Deck Radio Report: Wind from Josh Fields' swings and misses will power entire city and other predictions
Monday, Jun 1, 2009
This week's predictions: the Sox third baseman will show he should work for the power company, Len Kasper's notorious temper will keep him from covering a Cubs series, and Ron Turner will improve on his mastery of the short pass.
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On Deck Radio Report: Taking advice from drunk fan in stands, Piniella will release Kevin Gregg and other predictions
Monday, May 25, 2009
This week's predictions: Patrick Kane will mistakenly think he's all grown up, things yelled by spectators will start to make sense to the Cubs skipper, and a softball player will set a Ripken-like record.
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A Public Service Announcement from Screamin' Johnny Blaze: Don't go to Detroit
Thursday, May 21, 2009
The Heckler's sports talk radio host describes his recent visit to Detroit and why you should never go.
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On Deck Radio Report: Most Blackhawks fans flocking to Michigan for Game 2 will be swallowed up by the horrors of Detroit and other predictions
Monday, May 18, 2009
This week's predictions: Blackhawks fans will go to Detroit but never make it to the game, Milton Bradley's paradoxical temperment will be explained, and WGN cameramen will be given a new rule.
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Radio Brief: Cubs relievers read rulebook, learn it's not requirement to put first batter on base
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Cubs coaches find out their relief pitchers are not only bad but also not very smart.
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On Deck Radio Report: Bears will add veteran receiver they've been looking for when Conway comes out of retirement and other predictions
Monday, May 11, 2009
This week's predictions: a Cubs promotion will cause an uproar, the Bears will find this year's non-factor to play receiver, and an ESPN anchor will be involved in a hairstyle related firing.
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On Deck Radio Report: Emilio Estevez will make triumphant return to coach Ducks in middle of playoff series and other predictions
Monday, May 4, 2009
This week's predictions: Cubs will skirt alcohol laws to pump revenue on Cinco de Mayo, Anaheim's hockey team will return to its original coach, and a softball team will give itself an unoriginal name.
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Screamin' Johnny Blaze labels Thursday's Bulls game the greatest NBA game ever
Friday, May 1, 2009
Screamin' Johnny Blaze was at Game 6 at the United Center and ranks it among his top five days of all time.
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On Deck Radio Report: Cutler and Orton will show off their true talents by competing in a drink-off and other predictions
Monday, Apr. 27, 2009
This week's predictions: Brenly will need medical treatment on a trip back to Arizona, the Bears former and current QBs compete in a venue even more fitting for them than a football field, and Fukudome will spin himself into the stands.
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On Deck Radio Report: Despite being nonsensical, Hawk Harrelson's latest catch phrase will get him in trouble and other predictions
Monday, Apr. 20, 2009
This week's predictions: the Cubs will pay more attention to a non-baseball sport, the Sox announcer will go from folksy to offensive, and Lovie will get in trouble for using an old catch phrase.
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On Deck Radio Report: Patrick Kane will get all his homework done early to concentrate on playoffs and other predictions
Monday, Apr. 13, 2009
This week's predictions: the Blackhawks young star will show how adept he is at balancing an NHL career and high school, the Cubs young double play combo will get in a fight, and the Sox will give their fans the chance to do something they all want to do.
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Radio Brief: Chicago managers attempt to end media barrage by agreeing to stop using leadoff hitters entirely
Friday, Apr. 10, 2009
Cubs and White Sox skippers are sick of answering questions about the leadoff spot and doing something about it.
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On Deck Radio Report: Bradley will last two games before umpire incident gets him suspended for year and other predictions
Monday, Apr. 6, 2009
This week's predictions: the new Cubs outfielder will surprise many by making it through their whole first game without a blowup, the new Bears QB will find the mere act of becoming a Bear has diminished his skills, and baseball officials will find attendance down but not blame themselves.
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On Deck Radio Report: Cub fan will have fun at Next Year Day Party despite getting in fight with Woo-Woo and other predictions
Monday, Mar. 30, 2009
This week's predictions: Lovie will continue to hold no one accountable, a Cubs fan will duke it out with a superfan, and the Bulls making the playoffs will not sit well with the NBA.
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Radio Brief: Lilly mistakenly thinks playing for U.S. national team means he's one of the league's top pitchers
Wednesday, Mar. 25, 2009
Cubs pitcher doesn't realize he was just one of few U.S. born pitchers willing to play in the WBC.
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On Deck Radio Report: Zambrano will again have dehydration problems due to lack of fluid intake since last season and other predictions
Monday, Mar. 16, 2009
This week's predictions: Paul Bako will make team but not in a playing role, the Cubs ace will need to start hydrating himself again, and the Bears GM will do the same work as anyone who is not the Bears GM.
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Screamin' Johnny Blaze explains why the World Baseball Classic is so important he's ready to send other people to war over it
Friday, Mar. 13, 2009
Screamin' Johnny Blaze thinks the WBC is the most important event, sports-related or otherwise, in a long time.
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Heckler Comic: As Tiger returns, Obama suggests ways to fix the game
Monday, March 2, 2009
Woods to give his strokes to other players
Obama aims to fix golf
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Radio Brief: Cubs make up for playoff debacle by beating Dodgers in Spring opener
Thursday, Feb. 26, 2009
The Cubs get some completely satisfying revenge on the Dodgers.
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The final very important video from Joe Malonecki about Spring Training 2009
Tuesday, Feb. 24, 2009
Send this sad sack to Mesa, would ya?
In his third and final appeal for help, The Heckler's South Side reporter Joe Malonecki tells of his only other attempt to get out of state.
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On Deck Radio Report: Aramis Ramirez will officially become slowest Cub after losing race to Lou and other predictions
Monday, February 23, 2009
This week's predictions: the Cubs third baseman will again demonstrate his laziness, Jerry Reinsdorf will find no takers in an attempt to sell the Bulls, and Brian Urlacher's unfortunate continued aging will make Jerry Angelo unhappy.
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Radio Brief: Sox new Spring stadium expecting huge crowds, except when Sox are playing
Wednesday, February 17, 2009
At least one resident of the Camelback Ranch will bring in the fans.
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On Deck Radio Report: Cubs new owner will prove he's a Cubs fan with Cub fan-like behavior
Monday, Feb. 16, 2009
This week's predictions: Rickett's will show he's just your average Cubs fan, Paul Bako will put on a display of his lack of hitting ability, and Angelo will worry about more important things than the draft.
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Screamin' Johnny Blaze professes his love for crazy fans and hatred for Valentine's Day in a special Valentine's rant
Saturday, Feb. 14, 2009
Screamin' Johnny Blaze talks about something he loves even though he hates being forced to love things on Valentine's Day.
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Radio Brief: Paxson considering stepping down to spend more time with players he loves
Friday, Feb. 13, 2009
The Bulls GM is tired of being stuck in his office, away from the people he loves, Bulls players.
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On Deck Radio Report: Ronnie Woo-Woo's wish to be out of the spotlight will prove difficult to fulfill and other predictions
Monday, Feb. 9, 2009
This week's predictions: Bulls players will find their interests wandering to activities off the court, the Cubs "mascot" will try for normalcy, and Lovie will spend Valentine's Day with someone very special to him.
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Screamin' Johnny Blaze is excited about the talk of hope and change by the new Ricketts' administration
Friday, Feb. 6, 2009
The choice of an actual Cubs fan to own the Cubs makes Screamin' Johnny Blaze proud to be an American.
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A Very Important Video from The Heckler: Send Joe Malonecki to Spring Training
Thursday, Feb. 5, 2009
The Heckler's South Side reporter needs your help
The Heckler's South Side reporter Joe Malonecki really wants to go to Spring Training with The Heckler this year, but he needs your help. Make a contribution to The Joe Malonecki Fund. There are six ways to contribute, from the Ozzie Plan ($250) to the Brian Anderson Plan ($5). You get all sorts of cool stuff with your contribution.
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Radio Brief: Cubs renew waste disposal contract with Orioles
Wednesday, Feb. 4, 2009
The Northsiders will continue to utilize Baltimore's services in removing garbage.
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On Deck Radio Report: Ricketts will question decision to buy Cubs after learning of Pie trade and other predictions
Monday, Feb. 2, 2009
This week's predictions: Ozzie will be honored for his use of language, the Cubs new owner will get a few surprises, and the Bulls will continue to be mediocre much to everyone's surprise.
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Screamin' Johnny Blaze talks about his disdain for hotels, spicy mustard and both Super Bowl teams in this Super preview
Friday, Jan. 30, 2009
He might not have a press pass, but that won't stop Screamin' Johnny Blaze from shouting his opinions about the Super Bowl.
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