Injured Blackhawks goalie Corey Crawford was spotted golfing at Donald Trump’s famed Mar-a-Lago resort in Florida this past weekend. This comes as confusing news to fans who have been in the dark about the Crawford’s mysterious “upper-body injury” for several weeks.
“This is how Corey heals,” said Coach Joel Quenneville at an impromptu press conference. “With 36 holes, followed by three Big Macs, a bucket of KFC and a Diet Coke. He loves Diet Coke. We’re not worried. He has all season to get back in the net.”
Crawford was not able to be reached for comment, but he did send out a Tweet Saturday night, which read: “Nothing wrong with a round of golf. Hossa should be golfing to [sic]. Terrible recovery. Weird!”
Crawford’s agent, Lucy Esposito-Freeman, also addressed the media Saturday, shedding some light on her client’s activities during his extended absence.
“The goalie has more important things on his mind than talking with the press,” said Esposito-Freeman. “Since being moved to injured reserve he has become a golfing expert, making many improvements to the course. Corey is, like, really good. He could golf professionally, but he’s too committed to making the Blackhawks great again.”