Worried about the precarious status of his employment, downtrodden Bears coach John Fox asked the team to review his contract hoping for some clarification on exactly how and when they could terminate him. What they discovered was that due to what insiders are calling an “undiscovered clerical error,” Fox’s contract was never properly executed and therefore he hadn’t actually been hired to coach the team in 2015. Fox’s employment was immediately nullified.

“Due to an unfortunate string of events, John’s no longer the head coach of the Chicago Bears,” said GM Ryan Pace. “Frankly, we were a little surprised he asked us to review his contract for him, when it was pretty clear this is something he should have done himself. Had he played his cards right, he’d still be employed, at least until the end of the season. Instead, we get to send him loose now. Clean break!”

Fox’s tenure might be best summed up by another review he requested during Sunday’s 23-16 loss to the Packers. Thinking running back Benny Cunningham had scored a TD after a 23-yard catch and run in the first half instead of being ruled out at the two, Fox threw a challenge flag. After officials had reviewed the play, they determined Cunningham actually fumbled the ball onto the pylon, which forced a touchback and turned the ball over to Green Bay.

“Man, I’m just not having luck when things get reviewed lately,” said Fox. “Luckily mediocrity is acceptable here. Otherwise I’d be worried.”

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