Following what appears to be a struck deal to partially salvage the 2011-2012 NBA season, the actor who plays Benny The Bull quickly scoured his basement apartment in a panic, screaming “Where’s the head?!”

After displacing volumes 1-7 of Aqua Teen Hunger Force, the entire Method Man discography and countless Taco Bell wrappers, “Woody” remembered the costume was at the United Center.

“Good thing,” he laughed. “I woulda had to Febreze the shit outta that thing.”

Woody says it will be good to be back to work with the Bulls. During the layoff he’s had to take numerous side jobs to purchase his glaucoma medicine and pay his rent. One such job featured him as “Billy Del Toro,” whose craigslist ad promised “a sexually charged slam dunk for your furry experience.”

“Woody” said he’ll just be happy to be back to work as Benny and see Joakim Noah again.

Kelley Green